"Search me O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting." Psalms 139:23,24
The more I think about this verse, the more I see God and how much he loves me. It's amazing what I can learn when I stop and think about who God really is or isn't. He's not someone who's sitting back watching out for our faults in order to condemn us or someone who is expecting for us to be perfect robots. Not at all. He is a God who sees me with eyes full of love. Me. A person with crazy thoughts, and selfish motives and desires, etc... He wants ME. He longs that I come before him just as I am. He knows that as a human being and a young adult, I WILL mess up because he didn't make me a robot, he made me a person. What He does desire is a loving relationship with me. He wants me to accept his fatherhood and come calling, "God you and I both know I have a lot of wrong within me. And I need you God. I need you to lead me in the right paths you have for me. " Oh, I can only begin to know what a wonderful God he is. And he is still so much more.
You think you've messed up way too much to be loved by God? Well, that qualifies you even more to come near to his open arms with what you've been trying to carry on your own for far too long. God is way too much of a perfect loving God to turn you down. Just like even King David in Psalm 139:23,24 wrote. He realized he needed God, and we too need him so much. I challenge you to read this verse over and over and think about what David is praying here. Read the whole chapter, too, to see the desperation David had for God. Break it apart and let it become your prayer. It's one of the most sincere ways we can pray to God. Saying, "God know me. Know the deep things inside of my mind, heart, and my very soul. Lord, I know I'm wrong somehow. God look for what's wrong with me and bring me to the right way. God I REALLY NEED YOU." See what God can do when we come before and call on him.
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